I Suck At The Secret

today is president's day. so... happy president's day to all those presidents out there.

it being a holiday for a majority of my friends, my bff (kerry) called asking if karen and i would be interested in watching a movie today. that movie: he's just not that into you. the movie, which features an all-star cast is based on the book by the same name which was written by greg behrendt and liz tuccillo... who also wrote for hbo's sex and the city.

the movie has pure "chick-flick" written all over it. i have never read the book. kerry, however, has read the book. consequently, she thinks that i would enjoy the movie because many of the concepts mentioned in the book are what i would normally say to her or any of my other friends should they have been unfortunate and asked for my dating opinion. thus, kerry thought i would enjoy the movie because it would be a means for me to say "i told you so" to everyone.

for anyone curious, it should probably come as no surprise that my opinion on relationship matters is rarely sought... ever... because my honest opinions are generally not what people want to hear. (and the funny thing is, i am probably one of the more credible sources for an opinion because i'm married.)

luckily for me, i had to work today. so i could not enjoy the movie with my bff. plus, i figured that karen and kerry would much rather have preferred the quality "chicks night out" thing as my friends (jen and hot amy) were also going to attend the movie showing. so while they are enjoying the chicks night out, i did what any normal guy would do when passing on the opportunity to hang out with a bunch of women: i finished reading "the secret".

now, i suck at "the secret". jen actually has been hyping the secret for some time. when i first heard about this secret mumbo-jumbo... i thought the concept itself was garbage. at the time, "the secret" was presented to me that a person can get whatever they want by presenting it to the universe. of course, before i could officially proclaim "the secret" as "the crap", i had to do due diligence and actually read the book. never judge a book by its cover, right?

so needless to say, i started reading the secret on valentine's day because that was when karen lent me the book. karen borrowed the book from hot amy... who received it from jen as a gift. (for awhile, the book was in the back seat of hot amy's car... which led to my joking that "the secret is the back seat of hot amy's car"... snicker snicker.) interestingly enough, i believe karen and i read more of the book than either hot amy and jen. and really, who could blame them for not reading the entire book?

the book basically repeats the same thing... over and over again. i'm surprised the author was able to stretch the idea out to 200 pages. for anyone curious, the secret is... drum roll... the law of attraction.

apparently, people who understand the secret are stalwarts of society... including a plethora of famous people. the concept of "the secret" is simple: present your vision of what you want to the universe; believe you will receive it from the universe; and then feel good when you receive it. (in other words, your thoughts attract things.)

who knew it was that easy? naturally, there is no time frame on when you will receive your requested vision. in addition, if you do not receive whatever you asked for, it is due to the wavering in your belief. if i did not know any better, i would say that "the secret" sounded a lot like organized religion.

even though i had never heard about the book up until jen told me about it, i am amazed that "the secret" is so widely popular. (it goes to show you how much people can be influenced by the likes of oprah and the media.) that is not to say that "the secret" does not have some merit. part of "the secret" is based on the notion of mind over matter. i don't think anyone would disagree that if people put their minds to a given task, that it can be accomplished. i think this truthful notion... along with the quick fix method of achieving things... is what hooks people into believing the secret (aka. "the crap").

in my opinion, it's the journey in accomplishing the task that i disagree with. simply thinking something is going to happen... is not going to make it happen. take for instance the absurd example of a comic book super villain. a comic book super villain can think all day long about conquering the world. he or she can become delusional into believing that the world is conquered. but until he (or she) actually does something... it's not going to happen. sure it's a silly example, but i think to me, it illustrates the point that people need to be a little more proactive than just thinking it will happen.

of course, one of the other things that bothers me about the secret is that the book says everything happens to a person because he or she attracted it. now, i'm guessing that i'm not going out on a limb when i say people cannot possibly attract random acts of violence. who in their right mind, would do that?

as well, my son (braden) was born prematurely and passed away a little over five months ago. it's a little insulting to suggest that i attracted my own son's passing. i love my son. i still continue to love him to this day. yet, if love is one of the ultimate feelings of good... and if you are supposed to feel good when receiving a gift from the universe (in this case, the birth of braden)... then it seems a little odd to suggest that braden passed away because of my thoughts.

needless to say, i think "the secret" is without a doubt... "the crap". that is not to say that i will not partake in any fun activity night of creating vision boards as proposed by jen. i most certainly will. after all, it will be fun night to just hang out with my friends... and that's really all that matters. but as a book, "the secret" really is not worth reading.