before i forget, i want to thank all of our family and friends who have supported us since our son (braden) passed away in september. and actually, the evergreen memorial ceremony would not even have been possible for karen and i were it not for the generous contributions of everyone that we know. the stipulations to even be on the tree of life is a donation of at $1000 to the hospital, to which the name will remain on the tree for five years. so thank you everyone. it has been greatly appreciated.
(pictured below is braden's leaf.)
for anyone curious, i actually think braden's leaf is located in a nice spot. his leaf is near the exit door. not that i plan on hanging out at the hospital a lot, but if i did... it's nice to know that i can look up and see his name there.
anyway, the evergreen memorial ceremony was nice. when karen and i first arrived for the ceremony, we saw karen's parents and my favorite sister-in-law's (janine) family waiting for us. (unfortunately, my parents could not attend because they were preparing to have all of us over for dinner to celebrate the chinese new year.) apparently, my niece (kaleigh) had a present for us. well... it was more like a present for karen. kaleigh came over and immediately gave karen a bouquet of flowers. it was nice.
from there, we went to look for braden's leaf. interestingly enough, as we were looking for braden's leaf, we were approached by one of the trustees in charge of the evergreen memorial ceremony. she (barbara) immediately knew who we were and wanted to thank us for coming. granted, i suppose it probably is not too hard to pick out who braden's parents are at the ceremony because of my last name... and the lack of other asian sounding last names attending the ceremony. nonetheless, it was a little surprising to be "known". it is almost like karen and i are rockstars in the south shore hospital world.
anyway, after finding braden's leaf, all of us headed for the ceremony itself. the ceremony included some spiritual readings followed by the announcing of names to be remembered. it was very nicely done. whenever a name was announced, the evergreen society asked for the family members to stand up... to which they gave them a little present. the present is a little pewter trinket of a tree with some inspirational message. as well, they gave forget-me-not seeds to plant in the loved one's memory. all in all, it was a touching surprise.
following the reading of names, the evergreen society asked if anyone wanted to share stories or anything about their loved ones. in general, that's usually one of the tougher parts because watching others grieve can be heartbreaking. heck, i had to hold back the tears even before the ceremony started because i kept thinking about little braden. luckily, i was composed enough to make it through the ceremony.
needless to say, i did not share any stories about braden. if i thought i could remain composed enough for everyone, i probably would have said something along the lines of the following:
september of last year was the best... and worst month that i have ever had. my son, braden michael, came into this world in september. he weighed in at a whopping 1.7 pounds. as quick as he entered this world, he quickly left this world after a week. although i will never be able to raise him and experience the things that fathers and sons can experience together, i can only hope that in that time he was here that he knew his mommy and daddy were there for him... that they loved him... that they will always love him... and that they still miss him very dearly.
since yesterday, i have had feelings of regret for not saying anything in braden's name. perhaps that is why i am writing it now. it was also cute because my nephew (pj) wanted to say something too in braden's name, but he didn't as well.
anyway, near the end of the ceremony, karen and i were approached by another trustee (jennifer) of the evergreen society. apparently, they wanted to take our picture for the hospital. again, it was a weird feeling to know that they wanted to take our picture. we actually joked the picture was for diversity reasons. nonetheless, we obliged. so perhaps some day, people all over the south shore will see all of us on the cover of some south shore hospital publication... which actually would be nice so long as braden's name is on the publication. it would be like showing him off to the world... my son... little b... braden.
1 comment:
It was such a nice ceremony and I love the location of Braden's leaf. PJ must of regretted not saying anything either because this morning he told me "this is what I would have said, On Sept. 12th, my cousin, Braden died, I miss him and love him very much". There was a lot of lisping too :o)
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