I Suck At Tree Trimming

Saturday started off pretty well.

My friends (Cass and Ellen) were in the neighborhood and decided to stop on by for lunch. Apparently, there is a company located near us that offers 3-D videos of your baby while you are pregnant. Suffice to say, it was definitely good to see Cass and Ellen. It appears that Cass has amassed quite a collection of Singamajigs already for their upcoming baby. (I think the Singamajigs may be more for Cass.)

Later than night, Karen and I attended a tree trimming. Unfortunately, I suck at tree trimming. And naturally, that is when things started to go downhill for me. Every year, my friends (Marc and Kelley) host a tree trimming party to celebrate the holidays. This year, in particular, their party coincided with a UFC fight. So, they were gracious enough to host the party and the UFC pay-per-view.

Anyway, I was pretty excited about the UFC fight. Sadly, things never really go according to plan. The tree trimming was great. My usual group of friends (Garv, Leeann, and Andrea) showed up. Cass was there. Marc's family were there. My BFF (Kerry) was there. My friends (Adam and Kim) were there. My friend (Amy, the Czar) was there. It was definitely good to hang out with everyone.

Unfortunately, it was probably due that I would mess things up. And as a general rule, when I mess things up... I mess things up. I think I've become "that guy". Needless to say, you know things are bad when you wake up the next day not knowing where you are.

And sadly, that is what happened. I woke up at 4 in the morning with one of Marc and Kelley's cat sitting in my lap, a bucket next to me, and the faint smell of vomit in the air. It didn't take too long for me to piece together that the smell of vomit must have been mine.

I say "must have", because unfortunately I have no memory about the incident. Quite frequently, I seem to suffer from alcohol-related amnesia. The last thing I remember was hanging out and chatting with Adam in the kitchen. I have since been told that I actually went to watch the UFC fight, only to never finish watching it due to my purge. I'm not exactly sure how much time elapsed since that moment in time in the kitchen to my inevitable purge.

Some people have an unhealthy relationship with food. I seem to have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. No doubt, I have done physical damage to my liver and brain. I think what is probably the scariest part, aside from putting a strain on my relationship with my friends, is not remembering what happened at all. I could have probably murdered someone in my inebriated state and wouldn't even know it. Heck, I would be the perfect person to frame for a murder.

I think as I am getting older, my symptoms are getting worse. Earlier in my days, I could tell when things didn't feel quite right. I would get "huggy" as it may be. And I would perhaps sway a little. These days, there's just the swaying... and by that time, it's already too late. There are no signs that I'm passed that point.

After all, like I said, I remember talking with Adam in the kitchen. The best way I can describe the feeling is that it's almost like a switch that gets turned off. It feels that quick. And my memory seems to immediately shut down with it, which is pretty sad because my memory is poor to begin with. Throw in the vomit and well... perhaps that is a sign that my body just can't process alcohol like it used to.

Needless to say, I'm not too proud of my latest drunkenness. I feel awful for ruining Marc and Kelley's party. I'm not sure if there is anything I can do to make it up to them or anyone else at the party who had to witness or even help me. It's yet another in a long line of things that I am regretful for.

It's funny. One of the reasons why I titled my blog "I suck at..." is because of incidents like these. Granted, these incidents that I'm not proud of are not all alcohol-induced. Seeing Amy The Czar did bring back some memories where I wasn't exactly the nicest of nice, a fact only reinforced by my recent rummaging through of old high school crap that my mother brought over after cleaning out her attic.

It goes without saying that I am sorry for letting all of my friends down. I'm sorry that I'm a bad reflection on Karen. And right now, I'm even sorry that my baby daughter (Briana) has me as a father. At almost nine months, Briana thinks I'm like the greatest thing on the planet next to her milk. It's amazing how good I feel whenever Briana looks at me and smiles, because I know she simply adores me. Unfortunately, she doesn't know any better. I'm not even good at taking care of myself.