I Suck At Test Runs

Yesterday, Karen and I got our first taste of parenting by ourselves... together. Unlike other parents who have normal babies and get to take their children home shortly after delivery, Karen and I have been shuttling ourselves back and forth from our house to the hospital to take care of our daughter (Briana) who was born prematurely. Luckily for us, the hospital staff does a great job in taking care of our daughter when we cannot be there.

In addition, one of the features that the hospital offers is the opportunity for parents of premature babies to take a test run of solely taking care of their child before actually taking their child home. There are no nurses. There are no monitors. There is nothing but you and the child in one of the hospital rooms... with milk of course. Unfortunately, I suck at test runs.

Karen and I were originally supposed to do our test run on Tuesday night. Due to a late minute change by the doctors, however, we had to settle for taking our test run on Wednesday afternoon. Karen and I were given a room in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. And for a span of over eight hours, we took care of our little Briana.

I must say, the experience was definitely worth it. For me, I sometimes worry that I won't know what to do when it comes to taking care of a child. Should I be doing this? Should I be doing that? What am I looking for to make sure she is alive? These questions... and many many more... ran through my mind prior to Wednesday. To some extent, the questions still run through my head... I just don't think I'm as neurotic now when it comes to figuring out an answer.

When you're in a room taking care of your own child... you just do it. Granted, things are a little different when your child is born prematurely because the child's sole job is to eat and sleep (and thereby gain lots of weight). There is a little more leeway with full term babies because they already have the weight. In essence, premature babies need to play catch up when it comes to packing on the pounds. Luckily for Karen and I, Briana is a chow-hound. (Of course, she is more of a chow-hound for the hospital staff than she is for either Karen or I.)

But the whole test run experience proved to be quite valuable. Karen and I learned that we could in fact get Briana to eat like a chow-hound for us. Plus, we got to experience the grunts and noises that she makes during the course of an average day. And believe me, Briana makes lots of bodily noises. (You would be surprised at how loud a fart from a premature baby sounds.)

All in all, it was a great to spend time with Briana in an environment where she was not hooked up to monitors or had nurses taking care of her. It provided a glimpse into our parenting. Hopefully, she won't be emotionally scared by either Karen or I... more so me...